The Big 5

It has been said that any given person is the average of the 5 people they spend most of their time with. I’m sure we’ve all heard this saying before, right? But have you ever given yourself the time to really think about what that means for you?

Let me repeat myself.

You are the SUM TOTAL of the 5 people you surround yourself with the most. Let that sink in.

For me, that includes: my husband and my 4 closest friends (I’ll omit the names for now).

For the sake of making this easy, I’m going to list the top characteristic for each of the 5 people I spend the majority of my time with:

  1. Generous
  2. Loyal
  3. Protective
  4. Lively
  5. Consistent

So, these are my top 5. If I were to replace their names with what I believe resembles them the most, these 5 characteristics would be their titles, which theoretically mean these are the 5 traits that make me me.

I can’t stress the importance of this enough you guys, surround yourself with like-minded people that are going to not only improve your quality of life, but will make you a better person as well.

Now, I have to say (in the fairness of being objective) every single person has their own definition of who they want to be, what they find to be important, and what kinds of people they choose to surround themselves with and I fully support that! No one person’s viewpoint is correct—ever. But whatever it is for you, find people that will lead you to that perfect place in your life—the sweet spot.

We all have those friends who are in our lives out of political obligation. Let’s be honest. We all have friends we only see once a week between Friday and Sunday. Our “weekend friends”. And (I’m gonna let you in on a little secret here), THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.

“Every single person you meet comes into your life at a certain point for a certain reason and that is no mistake.”

But the 5 people you surround yourself with the most, that is 100% up to you, so choose wisely. Save a space in your heart for those who aren’t at the same place you are at right now. I’m not saying cut people out. I’m not saying completely lose touch and abandon all hope. I am simply suggesting (from my own experience) that as we get older our time is very limited. Life gets hectic, our priorities change, and time tends to run out when we need it the most. So take the very little time you do have to invest in relationships that are worthwhile and meaningful.

I challenge each and every one of you to take some time and reflect on this. Who are the 5 people you surround yourself with the most. What are their best traits? Have you found that you reflect them? Do you like what you’re discovering about yourself?

If yes, then great! You’re on the right path.

If not, make a change. It is 100% up to YOU.

Your friends, your significant others, they are a direct reflection of YOU.

Who do you want people to see?

Booses, May


**For more in depth conversations on this post and many more, tune in to ‘Ever Forward Radio’ on Apple Podcasts and Spotify (or your favorite Podcast player) every third Wednesday of the month!

3 thoughts on “The Big 5

  1. Hey there,

    I find your blog and feed to be inspiring and uplifting which is why I chose to follow you. Coming from a bi cultural background I’m sure you can somewhat relate to some of societals expectations we face as we learned to channel and balance both cultures. Aside from that, what I want to explore and speculate is your idea of friendship. Sure, friends can impact our lives every day and can potentially inspire us to be the best we can be. But what about those people who have little to no friends? Who live day by day trying to make the best out of the life they have in solitude because of their living circumstances (constantly moving) or issues with mental health (I.e anxiety, trauma) that people cannot understand and is out of control? They may not be fortunate enough to have those 5 close friends like you might have, because they may not have the opportunity or lifestyle to gain them. Are they doomed? Or can someone still thrive and succeed without the “big 5” you have mentioned. Some may have 1 close friend. Some may have none. Some may have 10 close friends with a dead beat Dad and an alcoholic Mom. I want your insight because this is something many many people are dealing with, and want to know if you think that having close and good friends determine a person’s outcome of having a happy and meaningful life.

    Thank you


    1. P,

      Thank you so much for your comment! You bring up an excellent point and topic for discussion. If you wouldn’t mind, I would like to take inspiration from this thought and turn it into a post of its own. Keep an eye out in the upcoming months and for my opinion on this. Thanks again for the feedback–this is what I love so much about this online community!

      XoXo, May


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s